Wish I could have told him…..

Yesterday was the day few years back he left my side, though I know he’ll always be there in my heart, but today I am not sure if that’s enough!! Yes I do wish at times if he were here now and I could talk to him, well I could never get down to do it when he was there. Yes I was always scared of you Babuji!!!

I can never forget you telling your friend that we both brothers are your proudest assets, your life’s biggest trophy. I still recall the day I got my JEE results. The look in your eyes, the pride resonating from you brought tears then and bring more now.

You were always the silent one at home. You were not the type to wrestle with your kids. But you would always bring in that silent strong presence. If there’s one thing I learned from you – The courage to always step forward in life, whatever be the adversity. “Fight along, never give up” that’s what you would always say whenever we would feel down over something. And how can I forget the pet line of yours – You are born in the family of soldiers, act like one, be brave and fight out all odds.

Thank you for teaching me that loved one’s always comes first, no matter what; Thank you for giving me your name; Thank you for your total honesty, even now people in the village respect me for being the son of such a man; Thank you for always respecting my opinion; Thank you for sharing your life with me; Thank you for teaching me about right and wrong and showing me the courage to step forward to do right and challenge wrong; Thank you for teaching how to think, how to act.

I hope you are looking down on me from up there constantly.  I love you very much and yes I do miss you terribly. I wish I had just one day to spend with you and just talk with you all day. I could never get down to tell you how much I loved and respected you. If given chance I would love to do so now. And this one missing part of my life also taught me – Always speak your heart out to the one’s you love before its too late!!!! We will see each other again, for sure. For now, I have wonderful memories of you to carry me through the rest of my life. Thank you for all you’ve done for me. Thank you for loving me so much.

Petals of my favorite shades sit lifeless in your memory,
Shriveled from the coldness of the tears of the gray sky,
Trying to preserve your voice, your laughter, and your words,
I’d never thought I’d miss you so badly that it hurts.

Took your presence for granted, I have myself to blame,
Now all that’s left are memories, and pictures in a frame,
Wish I’d spent more time with you, held your fingers tight,
I’d love to tell you so many things, while you were still in sight.

But I won’t let these few lines be one that’s filled with regrets,
For I know it won’t bring you back with all the tears I shed,
Don’t tell me to let go just yet, ’cause I still feel you’re here,
As I was there to watch a part of my life disappear.

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8 thoughts on “Wish I could have told him…..

  1. True, he is a man you could fall upon, rock solid support! The silent yet strong man. Even I was scared of him. But his presence would always install confidence.

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  2. He was strict, he was silent but he was strong and he always inspired strength among all around him.
    And Bhaskar i for one know he is watching you and feeling proud of his son.

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  3. RIP Uncleji……………
    He definitely was a man of strength. His loss was not just your loss, it was loss for the whole community there.
    We all are with you Chote

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  4. I wish i knew the right thing to tell you…..
    He is surely looking out for you through the guardian angels and he will always be proud of you.
    May his soul rest in peace.

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  5. May his soul rest in peace…………he is there bhaskar. Just look around you, you’ll feel his presence.

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